3 Ways To Help With Anxiety
Some Self-Disclosure…
I’m afraid of heights and a bit claustrophobic. Recently, I was laying there in an MRI for a scan that was going to take an hour. I got a little over half way through and started to panic. I felt incredibly claustrophobic.
I logically knew there was a way out of the machine, but panic began to rise and it felt unbearable. I started to cry and became immediately restless, which is a “no-no” in that machine. This is anxiety. Logic goes out the window and your emotional and physical reactions take over. When emotions become overwhelming, it can sometimes feel like you’re losing control, losing your mind and never going to feel better. I promise you, there’s hope and strategies to help.
I said to myself, “Okay, Nicole, you’re a therapist! What would you tell your clients to do?”
What did I do?
I tried counting my breathes at first, but that wasn’t effective. I allowed myself to cry a little, which helped some but not enough. Then I thought about making a list of fruits and veggies from A to Z. I started out strong (for the first 3 letters) and then kept getting pulled back into fear and panic. So, I added some visualization, imagining going through the grocery store to pick out the items on the list. This by no means made the fear, panic or sadness go away, but it made them much more tolerable.
It reminded me:
1) Skills Work!
2) Skills don’t come easy. They take practice, refocus and you might even have to try more than one.
Increased Anxiety…
There is an increase in the level of depressive and anxious symptoms people are experiencing. The last year of the Pandemic has been HARD. Really fucking hard! Exhaustion, overwhelm, anxiety, anger, hopelessness, and irritability are at an all time high.
I’m hearing from so many women I work with, they’re feeling burned out from work, annoyed with kids and partners, guilty for feeling annoyed, and physical symptoms of anxiety, like nausea, increased heart rate and heavier breathing.
3 Skills That Help:
I’m not going to lie, even I have asked myself a few times over this Pandemic, “Are these skills actually helping?” Sometimes I feel powerless and discouraged by external circumstances and am quickly reminded by the courage of my clients and the power of these skills that “Yes! They do work!” Recently, I had a client come back into session after we’d practiced a breathing skill the previous week and she said to me, “I tried that breathing thing we did and it helped! Even though I was still a little anxious, it helped knowing I had something I could do to deal with it.”
These skills work! And I pull many of them from my training in Dialectical Behavior Therapy, a powerful evidenced-based, skills-focused, practical form of treatment. Here are a few I regularly share with clients and use myself:
1) Paced Breathing
Breathing in through your nose for 4 counts and out through your mouth for 6 counts.
This technique slows down breathing and shifts you from being in a state of “fight, flight freeze” to a more regulated, grounded state. I often recommend teens incorporate this into their morning routine, setting a timer for 1-2 minutes, as a preventive and practice measure. It’s also a helpful technique “in the moment” when you’re feeling stressed or anxious about anything, including a presentation, upcoming test, or other anxiety provoking stimulus.
2) Distraction, using a list
Using the alphabet as a guide, create a list from A to Z or Z to A of things in any category.
Some ideas are cereals, fruits, vegetables, names, places, colors, books, movies, music artists, actresses and actors, etc. Grab a topic and make that list. This is incredibly helpful when you find yourself ruminating on something and unable to get “out of your head.” If you notice your mind wandering, simply notice it and bring it back to the list.
3) Cool Down: Literally.
Go into the bathroom and start running the cold water. Use your hands to splash some cold water onto your face a few times.
Or, if you’re brave enough (not me), jump into a cold shower. This can be incredibly helping in grounding you when you’re experiencing intense emotions. It literally and pretty immediately can help “cool down” the intensity of what your feeling. Give it a try.
If you’re feeling exhausted, overwhelmed or anxious, there are strategies to help you feel better. No skill or therapist fits everyone, so sometimes you have to try more than one, therapist and skill. Don’t give up. Keep trying.
If you’re interested in learning more about what therapy might be like with me, please don’t hesitate to contact me.